It is often possible to spot potential trouble ( and make the decision to avoid it) early on in the dating process if we pay careful attention to behaviors, actions, and words of men and not let our emotions cause us to have a foggy vision.
I put together a list of 49 red flags to watch out for when you are dating a new man.
- If he is too good to be true, he probably is not true
- Unable to cut ties to a previous wife/girlfriend
- If the bartender knows what he wants before he orders
- You feel you are not a priority
- Sexualize all conversations
- Chronic Bad financial situation, compulsive spending, financial irresponsibility. He always needs help to pay his bills
- Can’t hold a job, Poor work ethic (changes jobs often and it is NEVER his fault)
- Dysfunctional family. The crazy apple doesn’t fall far from the crazy tree
- Too close of a relationship with parents, especially with a mother
- He lives with parents or family members (not always a bad sign but if he is old enough to have his life together he should probably have his own place).
- His words and actions don’t line up, inconsistency
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- Multiple children by multiple women
- too many female friends on Facebook or following too many girls on Instagram
- Talking shit about an ex, If all the exes are “crazy”
- Secretive about parts of his life, too mysterious…I no longer find this sexy, and you’d be better off adopting the same attitude
- Tons of failed relationships
- Does not treat people of a lower social status right
- Doesn’t ask questions about you, mostly talks about himself
- Confrontational when disagreed with
- Disregard for your needs
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- Dismiss your feelings, opinions, concerns
- Excessive smoking, drinking, and use of drugs
- Have a tight hold of their phone
- He has anger issues. Physical or emotional violence, name-calling
- Blame shifts
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- Manipulative, gaslighting, silent treatment, Breadcrumbing, Passive-aggressive
- Controlling, he wants to dictate his will onto you
- Lack of open communication skills
- Unable to accept blame, criticism
- Poor relationship with his kids (for example choosing not to do visitation)
- Eager to pointing your flaws right away
- Serial cheater
- Lack of empathy or consideration for others
- A sense of entitlement
- Rude, bad manners, Speaks over you, interrupts, overly into you at first usually fizzles out fast
- Emotionally unavailable
- Thinks that YOU’RE the lucky one for being chosen by him
- Arrogant, selfish, narcissist, Thinks he’s the smartest guy in the room
- Low tolerance to frustration, cannot handle the word no
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- He quits doing the sweet things he did for you in the beginning
- It’s always other people’s fault, never theirs
- Excessive jealousy
- If you catch him lying
- He does not keep his word
- If you feel you like him more than he likes you, it probably is true and you don’t want to be in an unbalanced relationship
- Doesn’t respect your boundaries (for example wanting sex too soon )
- He finds excuses for bad behavior
- He denies when he gets caught
- You feel they are playing a game, there is a difference between seduction and playing games
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Also, grab your FREE “Attraction triggers in a man” guide.
Thanks for reading this post,